


Work in Progress

by Blazinwithzouis



Category: Real life - Fandom
Genre: Anon - Freeform, F/M, Love, Non Fiction, Pining, Random - Freeform, Real Life, Romance, Smut, idk - Freeform, pathetic, some smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-24
Updated: 2015-06-10
Packaged: 2018-04-01 01:15:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4000387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blazinwithzouis/pseuds/Blazinwithzouis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A girl falls for a married man from her new job and doesn't know how to cope. </p><p>This is autobiographical, to be honest. That is why there are no names or specifics included. Please comment and tell me what you think? Solutions to these feelings? Is it well written? Thanks.xx</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I have a dream. A very erotic, wishful dream and I will now explain it to you in full.

There once was a girl who worked in a kitchen downtown, a kitchen filled with Spanish slang and curse words, a kitchen filled with promise. One day, after a few months of working in this kitchen, the young girl is hit on in a very suggestive manner by one of her fellow coworkers. This coworker was very attractive, older but still young, married, and Mexican as fuck. At first the young girl laughed off the sexualizing comments as something cute and new and flattering. Then the comments kept coming and coming from this mystery man. Not only did he throw sexual compliments to her about her body and what he'd like to do, but they began to talk about actual things. Her family, her mom and how she passed, she noted his behavior when she told him. He didn't apologize or even seem phased in any way, which could point to two possibilities: one, he was a selfish dick who didn't care about anyone but himself, especially her, or two, he had experienced pain himself and he knows that hearing someone say "I'm sorry about your mom dying and all that, champ" isn't going to make you want to punch them in the fucking face any less. They talked about his family and how his dad and mom live with him and his wife and his son and daughter. He was building onto their house, they most likely bought it on foreclosure and we're doing renovations. They talked about his never ending, stereotypical amount of siblings, older and younger than him. His dad and one of his younger brothers worked in the kitchen with them, his brother was a short, funny guy with the biggest ass the girl had ever seen in her life on a man. His dad was the father figure of the kitchen, at least that's how she saw it. These might seem like basic things of conversation to you, but given her track record with guys and deep conversations with the opposite sex, this could qualify as ground breaking stuff.  
Anyways, let's get back to the interesting, sexual content that we all know everyone actually wants to read about. Well, as the days go by, the two individuals begin to talk more, get closer in a way. They were in no way romantically involved and probably never would be, considering he had a wife and kids to consider and the girl was not even confident enough to wear a bathing suit out in public, let alone ruin a perfectly good family. They talk though. They talk about sex, drugs, relationships, you know, the normal conversation pieces. He asked her how she likes to get fucked, and do understand this: this young girl is in no way innocent. She is indeed a virgin and has never willingly (another story for another time) touched a penis in her life. But alas, she tells him how she likes to get fucked (or at least how he believes she would like to get fucked, hypothetically of course). He is clearly and completely turned on by this girl, he is a horny 30 year old man that probably only gets some from his wife on special occasions or some ridiculous shit like that and she is a nervous yet daring virgin that will do anything to keep this guy wrapped around her finger.   
Soon, the man is getting more comfortable around the girl and vice versa. When they are alone there is unbelievable sexual tension and one day he asks if he can touch her ass. Now, this might seem juvenile to you folks reading right now, and trust me it is. But the first time he smacks her ass, she comes alive. She jumps out of her skin, gasping and her mind is scrambled. He is close behind her, they are in front of everyone yet hidden away where no one could ever find them and their sexual deviance's. He asks her if she's scared, clearly not concerned but aroused and challenging. She manages to croak out a hallow "No" and recovers slightly from the pat on the ass. But her body is singing, her mind is screeching at the top of its lungs and something is tingling in between her legs. Ladies and gentlemen, I don't know if your parents ever told you about the birds and bees but what they told you is wrong. You don't need a bird and a bee, one will do just fine. The young girl had a great deal of experience in pleasing her bird all by her lonesome for a large number of years, considering her age. So let's just say, she knew what that tingling meant and hopefully so do you! And she has felt a tingle for others, don't be confused. She has wanted to have relations with other people before, craved it even. But never like this. She has never been able to actually imagine herself with another person. She has never actually thought about the idea of letting a man take away her literal innocence and it has never appealed to her as much as it did at that exact moment his hand connected with her rather plump behind. You see, this young girl has a complex, a tragic flaw, if you will. She was incredibly insecure and this humble fact effected her nonexistent sex life. It's not that people didn't want to fuck her, because they did (although the sudden sexual attention had only begun recently). It was the fact that she hated her own body so much that she didn't want anyone else to see it, to feel it. But all of that seemed to fade away with this man. This confused the girl at first, she thought that it was just the attention that she liked, that she needed from then on. But soon she realized that it was indeed something more.  
As hours, days, weeks, a month or two passes by, the two are still hot and heavy. Emphasis on the hot. One day they are done plating up food and go separate ways in the kitchen. Then something very unusual happened. They both got called to work on dessert for the following day on the same line. They never got put on the same line, ever. And so they were working, hip to hip and then the pastry chef (a very annoying, thin, attention seeking girl) told the girl to go to the freezer to get the sponge cakes out, so she went, her eyes meeting with the mans before she departed. Thirteen seconds later, she is in the freezer and in comes the man, smiling like a crazy person. He is making a face and his hands are pressed together in the praying motion, she is turned away from him and he is motioning towards her ass. The girl scoffs and he asks,  
"What?"  
The girl just smiles, she is rather nervous still, she isn't used to the attention and praise of her body. But the girl gets a burst of courage and walks up to the man, they are undeniably close now. She takes her hand and it travels down his clothed chest, down to his crotch and she stops. Her hand begins to rub and grab like a child, desperate for their toy. At first he just smiles and looks at the girl. But then his eyes turn from humor stricken to nervous in a matter of ten seconds. He steps backwards.  
"Noooo, you have to stop" he says in his thick, Spanish accent  
"Why?" The girl asks, tilting her head in an innocent manner. She could get used to this teasing and sneaking, she really could.  
"Because...I'll get-"  
"Hard?" She answers for him, all falseness out of her tone now, she is genuinely shocked and aroused now.  
"Yeah, maybe" he looks down at his feet, a blush trying to force itself onto his cheeks.  
"Good, I want you hard" the girl says, boldly and slightly seductively.  
"Okay fine." He smiles and closes the freezer door and turns out the light.  
"Let's do it then" he says, smiling like an idiot, he was clearly trying to get a rise out of the girl.  
"No come on, let's go before they come to get us" the girl mumbles, her pulse still fast as a horse from the previous event.   
They leave the cooler and the night continues as normal, less touching though to make up for their longer period of time spent in the cooler. They couldn't get caught, of course. Even though it was technically legal, it would still be a tough situation to explain to his dad why his son was grinding his dick on her ass(that was his favorite thing to do, she deducted). So they were careful usually, but after that night they didn't need to be. The man seemed to distance himself from the girl after that. And that made her sad, so very sad and she didn't know why.


	2. Chapter 2

It's been a week since the girl last saw the man. And in all honesty, everything sucked. She had gone to work, expecting him to be there but he wasn't coming in that day or had clocked out early. This was to be expected though since the man also worked in construction and when it was nice outside, he had to go there (not to mention that construction paid a helluva lot more than the bullshit, measly $7.20/hour he was receiving then). But things were definitely not good there without him. She hadn't realized how accustomed shed grown to his touch, his smell, his entire being. She wasn't aware that her body would literally ache in anticipation for him. There was no denying it now, at least to herself, that she had immense feelings for this man. And it was also obvious that the man had no everlasting, heart fluttering feelings for her like she did him. He was clearly just in it in hopes of getting some, which sucked ass. While she was at work or at home or at school, pining for him, he was probably at his other job or at his house or maybe even fucking his wife, not thinking about the girl at all. She walked around all day wondering how he was and if he was happy, what he ate for lunch that day, is he sad or sleepy or thirsty. Just random things she thought about throughout the day and he didn't even think of her at all. It killed her. She craved his touch, even if it was just a slap on the ass or the fondle of her breast (which he hadn't done at this point in time, she really wanted him to). She wanted to feel the high, a high she only conceived whilst touching or rubbing or grabbing him. She wanted to feel him everywhere around her, inside of her, completely consuming her. She wanted to hear him groan and moan and curse because she was the one making him feel good. She wanted her late night and early morning fantasies to come to life finally. She wanted him to make her feel good, pull her hair, bite her lip. That's it. That's all she really wanted was a kiss. She dreams of fucking and riding and sucking him off, but that's not all she wanted, not even the primary desire. She wanted him to kiss her. In all of her years of being a teenager no guy had ever even kissed her. Guys had wanted to fuck her, yeah. But a kiss? Nah. A kiss is too intimate. Too personal. Too beautiful. So beautiful that she wants to share it with the man. She has hour long debates with herself about how it would happen, where, when, how it would feel. But she could never actually voice these outlandish desires to the man. One, he would probably think she's crazy and obsessive. And two, he wouldn't actually want to kiss her, but fucking her into oblivion is a whole other story. So she sits there in her bed every night, dreaming, wishing, imagining this forbidden kiss and how wonderful it would be. And then she cries for all the time she's been wasting on this man, cries for all the non-returned feelings she possess for him, she cries until she falls into a restless sleep where all she dreams of is his beautiful face.  
Love is a very strong emotion, so strong some people would die for it, kill for it. Love is terrible because it makes you do crazy and out of the ordinary things. Love causes people to change and evolve into obsessive, controlling, jealous, needy beings and the girl hated feeling those things. She was more comfortable with feeling nothing at all, something she usually tries to accomplish because it is easier to bear. Living while in love is like living with a humongous weight on your chest that you can only knock off sometimes and for a few moments at a time. Love is all consuming, it is painful and scary and intense. She thinks she is in love.   
She wishes she could go somewhere with him, just him and her and no one else. She wants to ask him about his life and how it was and what he would change and what he would keep the same. She wanted to know his deepest, darkest secrets and she wanted to be the only one that knew. She longed to feel his heart beat against her ear, hear his breathing and how it hitched when she touched him in the right places. She wanted to stay up until 4 am talking to him and telling him about her and listening to stories of how he used to ride bulls. She craved being able to touch him wherever she wanted whenever she wanted to. She wanted to be able to kiss him and call him hers. Most importantly she wanted to be his friend , wanted him to be her best friend.   
She hasn't seen him in almost two weeks and she feels it. She goes to work today and wants nothing more than to walk in there and see his face. Why is life so boring and drab without him? Why does she care so much for someone who doesn't give a shit about her? Why does she always go for people that don't fucking care about her? Why is she like this? Why is he so flawless and perfect? Why does his voice make her quiver in all the right places? Why does she feel so deeply for the conversations they have barely shared? Why is she so hung up on him? Is it because she hasn't seen him in so long and she is romanticizing his existence? Or is she really so obsessed/invested in someone who doesn't even think about her? She honestly doesn't know the answer to that worrisome question. The potential answer scares and excites her, it confuses her. And she's already confused enough.   
Sometimes she daydreams of him and her, nothing big, nothing too irrational. When she does she feels guilty and creepy in all honesty, but she still does it because it makes things a tad more bearable. She dreams that she and him are a couple in a way, together and happy to be so. She dreams things like she and him, living in an apartment in New York going to work everyday and coming home every night with a smile. She imagines loving her life and who she is spending it with. She imagines kissing him wherever she wants and whenever she wants. She imagines him touching her anywhere and everywhere all at once and she wonders to herself, would it still be fun and exciting if what they are doing wasn't prohibited?   
It has never occurred to her until recently, does he think she is beautiful? She knows that he enjoys certain parts of her body (ass and whatnot), but what about her face? Do her lips make him squirm? Do her eyes confuse and intrigue him? Does he find himself wanting to caress her cheek and nibble her earlobe or is it all just one big feeling of forgettable lust? She has asked him why he only likes her ass and he has told her that he loves everything, not just her ass. But did he mean everything as in, vagina, ass, and tits, or everything as in her hair, lips, eyes, nose, slightly humongous forehead, etc..? She doesn't know why she even cares. It's pointless to care and she knows that. She just can't help but wonder what he thinks about her, if he thinks about her.   
Anyway, that's enough of the gay, pansy ass shit, let's get back down to sex. The other night she was thinking about the man before she went to sleep. She was thinking about his facial hair, his beard and how it would feel, brushing up against her inner thighs. She thought about how it would feel in between her legs. She was thinking about how it would feel to grab his hair in her fist as he ate her out and how hot it would be. She pondered how his tongue would feel, licking and flicking inside of her. She really, really thought about his tongue and how talented it must be. All this thinking can do a lot to a young girl you know, especially one with such a large imagination (and sex drive). So the young girl put her hand down her underwear (yes she sleeps in underwear, no pants because her vagina needs to breathe thank you very much) and she began to rub and rub until a short while after she was a panting, moaning mess. She was repeating the man's name over and over again in a high pitched groan that Yoda probably couldn't even decipher. But then after she caught her breathe and settled down a little bit more, the girl began to cry. She cried and she cried and she cried, upset over the fact that this man doesn't even think about her (most likely) and he is her biggest and baddest fantasy. She cried herself to sleep that night, she never thought she would be wishing to be considered the "other woman", because right then all she was was another woman. And being another woman is not what she wanted with this man, not what she wanted at all.


	3. Chapter 3

One time the guys at work were outside by the man's truck, drinking beer like they sometimes did and the girl found out. She really wanted to go herself because it had been a rough week for her and she couldn't get alcohol anywhere else so she begged the man to give her some. They joked all night about it, she begged he would say no and laugh and she would laugh and hit him jokingly, it was all quite cute actually.   
"No." He said  
"Why not, please I won't tell anyone." The girl would whimper  
"Because you're too young" the man chuckled.  
"If I'm old enough to suck your dick, I'm old enough to drink a beer" the girl said, eyes unblinking.  
The man and the girl both burst out laughing after that comment. But then he told to ask another man and so she did. The other man said no as well but when the girl started to walk away, the man grabbed her ass and whispered in her ear,   
"Later baby" he said, hand still on her ass.  
The girl's smile was wider than the Cheshire cats all night after that. A little while later the girl received a call from her ex and so she went out to the parking garage. The call ended up in a petty fight and the girl was very upset. When she turned around to go back to the kitchen, the man was standing there, waiting.   
"Are you okay?" He asked, accent thick and sexy as usual.  
"Yeah I'm fine"  
"Come on, follow me" he grabbed her hand and rushed her to his car.  
The opened his trunk and grabbed a beer and told her to hurry to the elevator. They rode up to the eleventh floor (the roof) and he told her to drink it. It was dark outside and the lights in the hotel windows were all almost on. She sipped her beer and they laughed at all the naked people changing in the hotel, it was beyond lovely. This was bliss, she realized then. But the the girl got curious, she asked the man a few questions.  
"Have you ever actually cheated on your wife?" She inquired, not looking at him.  
"No. I've tried but I have only ever texted other girls." He answered, not looking at her either.  
"She's pretty, your wife, isn't she?" The girl asked, this time looking up into his deep green eyes.  
"Yeah" he looks down at her and nodded.  
After that the girl felt as if she couldn't touch him, she couldn't tease him. Out of respect for his wife or something, as if she hadn't been blatantly disrespecting his wife this whole time. That feeling was soon shaken off though when he grabbed her hand and led her to the elevator to return to work a few minutes after that. Everything seemed to be forgotten when he touched her, her logic, her reasoning, her feeling of loneliness and sadness, it all disappeared.   
At this point the girl didn't know what she would do if she saw the man again, it had been so long. Her eyes would probably pop out of their sockets to be completely honest. She couldn't wait to see him again, to touch him again. But then again, she almost wished she would never see him ever again.  
It's been 3 whole mind-fuck weeks and the girl is just tired. She's tired of not seeing his face, tired of dreaming about him, tired of rethinking their last encounters, tired of saying his name over and over again when she touches herself, tired of the idea of him. Loving him by herself is tiring as fuck and she hates it. Lately things have gotten better, she has gotten used to the idea of not seeing him but that isn't what the girl is scared of. She is frightened by the idea of what she will be like inside when she does see him again. She doesn't want to be paralyzed in fear or want. She wants to be normal, she wants him to miss her. She needs him to show her he missed her but the girl is afraid that the man will shake it off and act like there hasn't been 21 days since they have last seen each other. She needs him too feel it. She needs him to feel it for her right then and forever.   
A week into the three week hiatus taken by the man, another man took sudden interest in the girl. He worked in the kitchen as well and he was probably about 45-48 years old and looked about 50. One day the girl and this other man were both on time to work (everyone else, including the head chef was late) and so they were waiting outside together. This other man was incredibly awkward and hella creepy by the way. He had bug eyes and strange, grey facial hair. He wasn't the girls cup of tea, nowhere near it to be completely honest. So after about 5 minutes of waiting awkwardly, the girl walked to the elevators to go get coffee, and the other man followed. He wanted to walk with her to get the coffee and she didn't want to be rude so she said okay. They got to the coffee shop right underneath their job and she orders and coffee and he insists on buying it. She finally gives in and they begin to walk back to work, the girl praying that her boss had finally arrived. When they had almost gotten back the man randomly asks the girl to be his girlfriend. The girl nearly spit out her fucking coffee all over his weird ass face/beard, but refrained. Her heart sank into her chest because this type of thing scared her, being alone with strange men that wanted something from her. She clearly says no, she says that he doesn't want someone like her. She claims that she is crazy and he says he loves crazy. The girl can do nothing but chuckle awkwardly and pray that when they return back to work, everyone will be there. While all this is happening though, her mind is working a mile a minute. She is thinking to herself, why does it have to be him asking me to be his girlfriend, why can't it be the guy she actually wants. The man she actually has immense feelings for? Why is this creepy fuck asking her to be his when she clearly wants someone else and why isn't it that someone else asking her? She knows the answers to these saddening questions though. It isn't how it is supposed to happen, she knows. She just wishes so bad that it could be her and him and not her and the creepy guy demanding to buy her coffee. But life isn't fucking fair at all, the girl has lots of proof to defend that theory. Life isn't fair at all.  
It's been three weeks and one day and the girl feels hallow. She feels empty and lonely and needy, she feels like complete shit. She misses the shit out of the man, she misses simple things like getting to hear his sexy ass voice, getting to touch his arm, getting to listen to his not-frequent-enough stories, she misses everything. She wonders though, will it be the same when he returns? When god forsaken construction is over and he comes back to the kitchen, will it be the same? Will he touch her or will he ignore her? Will he call her baby or call her by her name? Will he slap/grab her ass from behind or will he walk past her like she was just another person? Will he love her or will he forget anything that could've been possible? The girl hopes that he doesn't forget, God she hopes he didn't forget.  
Let's talk about the girl a little bit, shall we? She really isn't that interesting at all to tell you the truth. She's an overweight, mainly unattractive girl, or at least that's how she views herself. She grew up in a house with her two sisters (one younger, one older) and her mother. Her mother was the best character the girl had ever encountered, best character she ever would encounter. Not to mention she was crazy as hell, literally. Her mother had a lot of problems to say the least, but then again, who didn't? But anyway, long story short her mother dated/married a lot of wrong as dangerous guys and finally married the most dangerous of all. He ended up getting her mother killed and that was almost a year ago. That is a really long story that the girl wants to save for another time. But anyway, the girl had a pretty shitty childhood filled with bullying, self loathing induced by the bullying from a few peers at school but mainly from her older sister. She grew up believing that she was ugly and fat and disgusting, she grew up looking in the mirror and thinking to herself, "God, is that really me? That's what I look like? What kind of sick joke..?". She was also sexually abused quite a lot throughout her childhood by one of the only male figures in her life, that is how the story usually goes, isn't it? How the girl hated being a cliché...moving on. The girl was very sexually interested as a young child all the way to now, she assumed it was because of being sexually abused as a child. She isn't a therapist or anything though. When she was younger she would go on children's sites with cute chat rooms and she would find "friends" and sext with them, not knowing at that age what sexting even was. She just knew it made a tingle in between her legs. So she would do whatever made her feel good to herself, no really knowing what the fuck anything was down there. Ah, to be young again. So, as the girl grew up she took honors classes, AP classes, etc... She always felt incredibly dumb compared to everyone else though, she didn't belong. Then her sophomore year she took a nutrition and wellness class and realized she wanted to be a chef! So the next year she took more classes, eventually she took all the provided culinary classes in the school so they sent her to the nearest career center for culinary arts ,where she flourished. She was the top first year student in her culinary class so her instructor recommended her to a catering job downtown. The girl had just quit her job at Kmart and needed/wanted the experience to get into the highest ranking culinary school in the world, the Culinary Institute of America in Hyde Park, New York. So that is what led her to her job in the kitchen, it is what led her to getting into CIA (the girl starts in November), and it is what started her budding obsession/love with this man.  
Code red!!! Code fucking red!!! The girl was informed today that she was going to see the man in two to three weeks. Two to three weeks, not months, weeks!!! The girl was so overly excited it was ridiculous. She wanted to pass out from anticipation, she could've fainted from lack of oxygen flowing to her brain. The girl was the happiest she'd been in weeks at the simple thought of seeing the man in the near future. She was so worried, still. Worried that the man had forgotten about her, or worse, that the man had not forgotten but decided to just stop. If he stopped being the way he was with her, her heart would surely stop along with it. If he ended whatever the fuck they "had", the girl would lay awake at night, crying and cursing the way she felt. She would cry like this for weeks, life as she knew it would need some serious readjusting. You must understand, this isn't the first time the girl has had her heart disdainfully broken, but the second time. She didn't want to go through it again. She hopes he didn't forget.   
Tomorrow will be four weeks since the girl saw the man. Four weeks.   
It's been four weeks and 3 days. The girl keeps dreaming and dreaming and dreaming about the man and she doesn't understand why. At first she thought it was premonitions, she thought her mind was preparing her for his sudden arrival to work that day. But he never comes. He's never there to smile at her, to hold her from behind, to caress her ass hungrily, he's never there for any of it. So she just dreams of him nearly every night and prays that the dreams stop. She prays that he will come in the next day, acting as if no time had passed between them but also voicing the fact that he had missed the girl. That would happen if this were a perfect world, the girl thought. But the world is far from perfect, if the world were perfect the man would have never married or he would have completely ignored the girl and stayed invested in his "happy marriage". But no. Instead he came onto her and then he left, taking the girl's heart with him.


	4. Chapter 4

Sex. Such a simplistic yet terribly complex idea. It is only a mere physical act, right? That's how the girl thought of it. According to Christians and Catholics and many other religious figures/affiliations believed that it was something incredibly sacred and to be taken seriously. The girl's thoughts were far different than that before she met the man. She lied to him endlessly on how she had taken part in numerous sexual acts and how she knew what she liked when in reality she knew nothing. She only knew how to make herself feel good because she was a virgin in its utmost definition. She had never even come close to kissing another individual, let alone making love/fucking. It wasn't until just now, when the girl was thinking about the man and how much she missed him that she lied to him so much. Of course it didn't matter that she lied to him, it isn't as if the man actually thought about the things the girl told him besides right when she told him. It was like water rolling off of his back. It was quite depressing actually, the girl thought as she sat in her room, pining over the man for possibly the thousandth time. It is ridiculously stupid that the girl cared so deeply for this random, absent man. It is ridiculously stupid that the girl missed him so much, craved to know so much about one person as she did with this man. This stranger. She would love to wake up the next day and just decide to be done, decide to feel no more for him. But she knew that wouldn't help, she knew her heart wouldn't allow her to rest until it was completely broken.   
It would soon be 6 weeks since she saw the gorgeous, lovely man. Six torturous, disgusting weeks since she last saw the man that haunts her dreams.  
It is late and the girl should be asleep but instead she is laying in her bed, restless and depressed. She is thinking of the man and the last time she saw him, she can honestly not recall the exact last moment they shared, all she knew was that it wasn't as great as it should have been. All she knows is that if she could go back she would have asked for his phone number, told him the truth about at least one thing, maybe even asked him about his life. But instead their last encounter was probably vulgar and grotesque and beautiful and sexy. Sometimes the girl believed that they shared something that could ultimately surmount to something bigger than those types of encounters but deep down she knew that wasn't true. Deep down she knew that all of these feelings were to be demolished and denied. But sometimes the girl got courageous and thought about these feelings of lust, want, and awe she obtained for the man. She dreamed of the next time she would see the man. She dreamed that his breathe would get hitch when he saw her again, that he would discreetly nod in the direction of the nearest safe haven. That he would be waiting there for her, moments later and he would take her into his arms and whisper in her ear that he actually missed her. That he would grab her ass with so much eagerness and lust that it would cause the girl to moan out loud. That she, herself, would tell him that she missed him too, more than he thought. She dreamed that he would kiss her then, on the lips and electricity would spark between them in that moment. She dreamed so very hard that this outlandish fantasy would soon become reality but she knew it wouldn't, she knew it would be too good to be true.   
She misses him, so so much. It hurts her chest, hurts her fragile heart to love him the way she does. Every day she goes to work and hopes and prays that she will see him again that day and then there is that small part of her mind that hopes she doesn't see him that day or any other day after that. She cries sometimes but most of the time she can't, isn't able to. It's like the tears have stopped coming, it's like too many tears have been shed and too many emotions have been wasted. Lately she has been critically thinking about the man and her feelings towards him. She has been wondering if it is just in her head, if she is only romanticizing him and isn't thinking about how he actually was. Apart of her wants to be romanticizing her because of he is anything like she thinks he is, it startles her that someone could ever be that flawless and wonderous. It's scary how she could be so awed by a mere fellow human being. It scared her beyond repair, she hoped it was all just a dream. But when she pinched herself, she doesn't wake up she only remains in the state of consciousness she has always resided in.   
It's nights like these that the girl remembers. Nights like these make her remember how truly bad she felt even when was with the man because she could not actually be with the man. She remembers how it felt when the man would slap her ass without warning and how he'd ask if she wanted it again. The girl would be too flustered and nervous to actually respond so the man took her silence as a yes. She remembered how the man would grind himself on her when she was turned away from him and they were in a secluded area. The girl remembered how the man's eyes would light up with lust and even possibly pure happiness when he saw that the girl was alone in the cooler or the storage room so they could have a few mere moments of complete and utter bliss, even if it meant all he could do is grab her asscheek in a dark room for a split second, it seemed worth it. And even worse, the girl specifically remembered the feeling of depression and sadness she would feel when the man would ignore her or not give her his undivided attention. She remembered being hungry for him all the time, even when he was standing right in front of her. It was nights like these that made the girl remember how much she misses the man, and how much she would always miss the man. It was nights like these that made her...


End file.
